Barbie: A sexist abomination that will leave Greta Gerwig on the wrong side of history

Sexism (noun): Prejudice, stereotyping, or discrimination on the basis of sex.

A truly abhorrent thing, and something nobody should be subjected to. If you judge a person by their gender, then you should take a long hard look at yourself.

Try telling that to Greta Gerwig and her band of Barbie writers, who have obviously as of yet been unable to grasp the fact that women can be sexist too. In their warped minds, the shoe being on the other foot is absolutely fine as long as it gives them a chance to parade their deepest, darkest viewpoints in a 114-minute Trojan horse of a movie.

Because make no mistake, that’s what this film is – an exercise in hatred of half of the human population. One thing that Gerwig’s crew did do well was disguise that up until release day. For once, it looked as though we were actually going to be treated to a fun summer blockbuster with some unique ideas and a lack of identity politics.

Instead, millions – including the countless young girls who made up the primary target audience – were unwittingly subjected to some of the most barbaric opinions you will ever see on the big screen. Men are labelled fascists, blamed for every problem under sun, and ridiculed solely because of the way they were born. See the issue?

The big stroke of irony comes from the fact that by seemingly focusing on delivering a message that women should not be treated as lesser because they are women, Gerwig creates a bloated cast that – Margot Robbie aside – have absolutely zero defining character traits apart from being women. The idiocy is frankly ludicrous.

Of course, the real shame is that some genuine potential is cast aside in a bid to promote the message. The opening ten minutes or so, for example, do a brilliant job of building the world the characters inhabit, while the physical humour is pretty impeccable throughout. Robbie attempting to work out how to drink properly and Ryan Gosling being catapulted fifty feet into the air spring to mind.

Gosling is by far and away the best Barbie has to offer, which is again ironic given the greatest thing about a man-hating movie is, well, a man. He is laugh-out-loud on many an occasion, and it will be a surprise if we don’t see him feature prominently at next year’s Oscars.

Robbie herself puts in the type of strong performance we’ve come to expect from her, although the proper fleshing out of her character is sacrificed time and time again for some futile messaging elsewhere. The mother-daughter relationship between America Ferrera and Ariana Greenblatt, for instance, is afforded too much prominence despite its lack of impact on the film.

Greenblatt’s Sasha starts the movie hating her mother. By the end, despite no realistic development, she comes to like her again after nothing more than a couple of half-hearted monologues about what it apparently means to be a woman. Nothing feels natural.

Barbie has set the box office alight, and at least deserves some credit for its role alongside Oppenheimer in a weekend of cinema that will go down in history. However, the film will age horrendously – in a decade’s time, when the left wing-fuelled wave currently engulfing the industry has died down, viewers will look back and come to realise that a downright attack on men was not the way to go about tackling any sexism-related issues in society.

Before that happens, we can only hope that there haven’t been too many unsuspecting fifteen-year-old girls brainwashed into believing that their fathers, uncles, brothers and boyfriends are fascists – something Greta Gerwig would happily have them believe.

A well-documented interview from Margot Robbie did the rounds in the lead-up to Barbie’s release, in which she said that upon her first reading of the script, she was convinced it would never be allowed to be made. Now we can see why.

What had promised to be the funnest and most carefree film of the year instead saw all common sense tossed aside in favour of blatantly sexist agenda. She is in the limelight for now and will be for the foreseeable, but Gerwig will end up on the wrong side of history for this abomination.

Rating: ★★☆☆☆